Globalization vs. Moroccan wedding tradition. Fight!

While I was trying to better understand Moroccan weddings, I decided to interview people and see what expectations people have for their dream wedding. I sat down with one of my Moroccan friends, Asmaa Az, and I asked her to describe her dream wedding. Her response was a wedding that would be three to four days long and would include the bath day, the receiving of the gifts, the henna day, the big wedding celebration in a castle, and the morning after breakfast with the families; it would be a traditional Moroccan wedding. But when I asked her why she wanted to follow the traditional wedding path, her answer was honest and not what I expected to hear. She told me, “when you grow up seeing these elaborate types of weddings you come to expect the same thing for yourself” and even if she had wanted to have a different type of wedding, “it is not what others would expect and they would not enjoy themselves”. Not once did she mention protecting her fertility or following in the footsteps of her ancestors. This caused me to step back and reevaluate; what does the modern Moroccan wedding look like? Why have perceptions of the wedding changed? Why not completely modernize the Moroccan wedding practices?

Gradually over the past two centuries, the deeper meaning and purpose of the culturally rich Moroccan wedding tradition has faded into obscurity. Protecting one’s fertility does not constitute as one of the modern Moroccan bride’s major concerns when going through the wedding process. She is most concerned with planning the perfect beautiful wedding where the celebrations flow smoothly and everyone is joyous.

Globalization at work

Globalization has caused many of the changes the Moroccan has undergone. With the spread of technology around the world, borders between nations and their cultures are blurring and blending. Everywhere you look in Morocco, you can see traces of European influences, Islamic influence and Northern African influences all meshed together. With easy access to media, Western beliefs and practices have seeped into the culture of Morocco. Young influential children grow up watching Western TV shows and movies, in which sex and sexual appeal are key characteristics. Their minds are being molded to behave less conservatively and more mainstream, rather than to follow the deep seeded traditions of the Moroccan way. For instance, on the campus of Al Akhawayn, the university in Morocco I am studying at, everywhere you look you see young Moroccan girls wearing provocative clothing; the skirts are miniscule, the shirts see through, the heels mile high and their makeup and hair done to perfection. Also, all over campus, couples engage in public displays of affection with their hand holding, cuddling and kissing. The less conservative actions, though, does not mean that they have thrown away all that Muslim Moroccans beliefs and values. A woman’s virginity remains heavily protected, just in less obvious ways.

Rent-able Wedding Furniture

Not even the wedding process has been left untouched by globalization. For instance, an old Moroccan wedding tradition was for the parents to arrange the marriage. In the era of modernity, this practice has withered away, and Moroccan children are allowed to choose their own spouse. Before getting married, though, the couple must receive the blessing of the parents (Hajji. pg 47). Globalization has created fierce competition in markets all over the world. For centuries, the wedding takchitas were, painstakingly, made by hand by the female relatives of the bride. But, during a time in which weddings have become marketable, it is a lot easier and cheaper just to rent, or buy, the wedding takchitas from a shop. Also, as you walk through the markets, called the madinas, of old Moroccan cities, like Fez or Marrakech, you will find shops, and entire warehouses, that house wedding furniture, like the lmida, for people to rent out. Also in the past centuries, the food eaten at the wedding celebration was always prepared by the families of the bride and groom. In a globalized society, though, one has friends far and wide, and so the attendance at weddings has grown beyond what the family is capable of feeding. Thus, most often, the bride’s family will make use of a caterer (Hajji. pg 52).

While many aspects of the Moroccan wedding have changed in the face of globalization, most of the old traditions have remained. The henna day, the carrying of the bride, on the lmida, during the wedding celebration and the breakfast on the morning after the wedding are important traditions that have remained alive.

In a time where the many other aspects of their lives are modernizing I am curious as to why Moroccan women continue to carry on many of the wedding traditions of their ancestors. On one hand, as Jalila Hajji argues, the bride chooses to keep the traditions of her ancestors in order to, “protect and respect her family dignity [and so] she spends her money and time on preserving this dignity” (p 44). Hajji also explains that a good daughter must be happy during her ceremony and preparations to show how well her mother educated her, thus bringing her family honor. Many brides though do not have such noble reasons in today’s marriage market. Some women, like Asmaa, simply just expect to have the traditional wedding as a result of having been raised around that custom. Even as the world continues to globalize, Moroccan weddings have traditional roots that are too deep to dissolve; the traditions may be altered but they will live on in generations to come.

Communal Bonding during the Moroccan Wedding Process

During the week before a wedding in the West, various cleansing rituals are performed to help the bride say goodbye to her old life of solitude, and help prepare her to enter the next stage of her life. Throughout the entire process, she is surrounded by her closest female friends and family members. From getting manicures and pedicures, and all around beautified, to the bachelorette party, and ultimately the actual wedding, the bride’s community gathers close to help celebrate the bride’s transition into the realm of marriage. Similarly in Morocco, the purification rituals before the wedding draw the community together in an effort to ease the path for the bride to travel, as she moves on to a new life.

Symbolic Candles

On the first day of wedding rituals, the bride and her closest single female friends and family members make their way to the local hammam for the bath day, which plays a large role in the cleansing of the bride for the next stage of her life, physically and symbolically. Only unmarried females are allowed to attend the hammam with the bride, as a result of the belief that a married woman’s presence would bring bad luck. During the walk, the bride dons a cloak to protect her from the devil’s eye which may be searching to cause her harm or illness, potentially jeopardizing her fertility. Her female companions surround her, as well, to provide another layer of protection. Once the wedding party arrives at the local hammam the bride removes her clothes and bathes in a hot, soothing tub. While the bride’s female companions scrub her spotless, she eats the dates and drinks the milk her family has prepared for her, so that she will have a sweet, happy life and be prosperous. This practice, of feeding one’s guest of honor, not only applies to the wedding rituals; common Moroccan hospitality dictates that the host serve their guests some type of beverage, usually mint tea, and sweet snacks to make them feel welcome and at ease. Back in the hammam, the brides purifies her physical body while her friends light different colored candles around her to help promote certain qualities: white candles to promote purity, yellow for happiness and green for fertility. Throughout the bathing process, the women of the family sing traditional songs to the bride, to create a relaxed atmosphere (Hajji. pg 49).


After the single women of the family have all been cleansed and purified they come together with the married female relatives in the home of the bride for the henna day. Before the henna process begins, the women place milk and sugar in the room to represent fertility and prosperity and they light candles around the room to symbolize a bright future (Kurr). After setting up the room, the henna process can begin. Geometric and floral henna designs are drawn on the hands and feet of the bride, which are the most common for Moroccan brides to have, for, as many traditionalists say, these designs ward off evil spirits, bring good luck and promote fertility (Che Din). While the bride waits for her henna to dry, which could take multiple hours, some of the other younger unmarried girls receive less complicated henna designs. The henna day also serves as the time when the married women of the family give advice and share the secrets of marriage with the bride. Having her close female friends and family around her, the bride can feel more at ease while preparing for her new life.

Wedding Takchitas

On the day of the main wedding celebration, the women of the bride’s family help the bride dress in her wedding attire. Just like in Western wedding cultures, the Moroccan bride dresses with her wedding party, so her close friends can keep her calm and her nerves settled before the wedding. In most regions of Morocco, the bride wears a specially made Moroccan dress, a takchita, composed of two pieces: a simple dress as a first layer, and a more elaborate second layer, often richly adorned with embroidery, beading or sequins, which buttons up the front (Hajji. pg 54). With the help of her female dressing aids, she changes her takchita up to eight times during the night. There are some regions of Morocco, though, that have their own special wedding attire different than the standard takchita. For example, Cynthia Becker describes the type of traditional outfit that Ait Khabbash Berber brides, located in the southeast part of Morocco, don on their wedding day. The wedding attire includes a special headdress called an aabroq and a wool belt. The aabroq is a red scarf placed fully over thin pillows that are then tied, by one of the bride’s female relatives, to the bride’s head. Another relative rubs the eye area of the scarf with water and some oil to make it thin enough for the bride to see through. The sides of the headdress are then sewn together and bands of sequin trimmed fabric are wrapped around it to bind it together even more tightly. The red color of the aabroq symbolizes virginal blood, menstrual blood and of the blood of childbirth and the green tassels that hang off it represents female fertility. Becker notes that “the several layers of ties, sashes and silver jewelry that create the bride’s headdress symbolize the containment of her fertility within marriage and protect her during this luminal, in-between stage” (pg 110). Also the red scarf the bride wears completely covers her face in order to create a barrier between her and the outside world and to protect her against the devil’s minions who would try to enter the body and cause illnesses. Another major part of the Ait Khabbash wedding attire is the wool belt. Jurgen Curator’s argument that the belts worn by Islamic brides are tokens of their virginity also holds true for the beliefs of the Ait Khabbash tribe. Becker explains that the wool belt worn by the Ait Khabbash bride relates to fertility and its control within the marriage (pg 112). The dressing process takes a long time due to the intricacies of the wedding outfit, but having the bride’s closest female friends and family with her makes the countdown to the night’s festivities more bearable.

Moroccan Wedding Feast

Around nine or ten at night, the whole community, not just the females, comes together to celebrate the marriage of the bride and groom. The festivities are loud and joyful, the air filled with music and the floor crowded with dancing bodies. When the bride arrives she is surrounded by a wall of men to hide her from the view of the crowd until the groom removes her veil (Che Din). Then the men in the groom’s family carry the bride on a special throne like chair, the lmida, around the room to show her off (Hajji. pg 53). Back on solid ground, the bride and groom greet the various party comers and thank them for their well wishes; their actions are an extension of Moroccan hospitality. Sometime between 11 and 1 all the guests are treated to a delicious Moroccan feast of succulent tagines, vegetables, fruits and, of course, mint tea (Renton). After dinner the merry celebration continues well into the early hours of the morning, sometimes 5 or 6. By the end of the night everyone is worn out but filled to the brim with happiness.

The morning after the wedding night and after the exhibition of virginity is executed, both sides of the family gather together to eat a celebratory breakfast, called l’flour. The breakfast marks the end of the wedding week, and celebrates the new marriage (Hajji. pg 58). The light and cheery atmosphere at the breakfast table results from relief over the successful completion of the wedding process, and over the confirmed virginity of the bride. Moroccan weddings would not be successful without the aid and support of the entire community.

The role of Fertility in a Moroccan Wedding

A few weeks into my stay in Morocco, I was having an amazing time traveling the country and experiencing the culture first hand. But back at the university I had gotten stuck in my quest for more knowledge concerning Moroccan weddings. I had absorbed so much information about weddings, and I was unsure of how to deepen my understanding of this great cultural tradition. But as I continued my research on Moroccan weddings, I started to recognize a pattern in the steps of a wedding. There seemed to be a heightened emphasis on the protection of the bride’s fertility present in many of the steps, and I couldn’t help but be curious as to why that is. Before I could delve into the specifics of a Moroccan wedding, though, I had to first understand why fertility is so highly prized.

As I began to examine the importance of fertility in Morocco, I came across this article by Nikki Keddie, who explains that this emphasis on fertility in Islamic communities is a result of the ideology of the role of Muslim women, who are seen primarily as reproducers. And, indeed, when I looked at it statistically, as Kevin McQuillan does, I saw that countries with Muslim populations, such as Morocco, “figure prominently among the shrinking of societies that continue to experience high rates of fertility” (p25). The fact that reproduction is most highly revered within Muslim nations comes from a more primitive root; Cynthia Becker argues, the “fertility and sexuality of women are crucial to society because they ensure the continuation of the group” (p.106). Western communities are considered sustainable if they are able to provide for themselves economically. Islamic societies, on the other hand, depend on their ability to breed the next generation to ensure the continuance and sustainability of their society and culture. Therefore, in order to guarantee the prolongation of the Islamic community, a woman’s fertility must also be protected.

As members of a patriarchal society, Islamic men have held onto the belief that through control and maintenance of a woman’s virginity before marriage, her fertility could be preserved. In order to get the best understanding on the Islamic view on virginity, I looked to the Quran. There are many Surahs that mention virginity, all of which seem to revere girls who are virgins. For example, Surah 55:57-58 states that “Virgins are as fair as corals and rubies” and Surah 55:70-77 says, “In each there shall be virgins chaste and fair…Dark eyed virgins sheltered in their tents whom neither man nor Jin will have touched before”. The Quran goes on to state, in Surah 56:70, that “We created the houris (beautiful women) and made them virgins, loving companions for those on the right hand”. This implies that women are created with the expectation of staying virgins, and not only are they protecting it for themselves, but for their future husbands and for the entire Islamic community.

the Quran

Furthermore, just as Meriem Aherdan describes, many believe that virginity, on an incorporeal level, is representative of a woman’s family’s honor, so unmarried women must remain pure to guarantee that the family’s honor is untainted. Should a female fail to remain a virgin before marriage, great dishonor would be thrust upon the family name, for the girl’s actions show a failing on the part of the father and brothers in that they were unable to properly support and raise her to become a woman of honorable conduct. As a result of the dishonor she brought to the family, she would face harsh punishment, such as disownment or even a beating.

On a more physical level, I found that many people, as Carla Obermeyer explains, believe that women are “more vulnerable to the danger of pollution — ritual and moral—a point that has ramifications not only for moral judgments but also for notions of illness and sexually transmitted diseases” (p.245). Thus, premarital abstinence is the best way to prevent the possibility of contracting any illness or STD that may affect a woman’s ability to reproduce. And so to preserve the future of the Islamic world, the responsibility relies both on the woman and the whole Islamic community to protect her virginity and by association, her fertility.

With the actual arrival of a woman’s wedding night comes the moment of long awaited truth: the exhibition of virginity. This centuries old tradition dictates that the marital sheets are shown to both families after the wedding night. Becker describes it as “a time when her virginity will be tested and her family’s reputation and honor will be upheld or destroyed” (p.113). For in the eyes of traditional Moroccans, a woman’s virginity places her in the position of, as M .W. Buitelaar describes it, “guardian of cherished family and community values” (p.250). Virginity is such an important aspect of the wedding process for the couple and their families that the bride will go to drastic measures to ensure that she is a virgin on the wedding night. For instance, in an article by Elaine Sciolino she describes how Gynecologists have reported that a significant amount of North African women have requested what they call “Virginity Certificates” at their appointments. Additionally, if the bride-to-be is not a virgin she might take the most drastic action a girl could take to protect her honor and get a hymenoplasty. A hymenoplasty is a surgical procedure involving the reconstruction the hymen which is often broken during initial intercourse (the lack of which would indicate the loss of virginity). Hymenoplasties are costly procedures but many females are too desperate to care, for, as Sciolino says, some girls believe that “not to be a virgin is to be dirt”. If a woman were fount not to be a virgin not only would the marriage end in divorce but she would have disgraced the family honor and that is unforgivable. From the mouth of Rachim Acid, “[This is] why conservative families tend to lock the females inside the house and hardly let them access the outside world. They are afraid of shame”. Hence, the maintenance of one’s virginity not only benefits the individual but rather protects the entirety of the family line and the Islamic community.

The Moroccan community took the task, of maintaining the virginity of young maiden women, upon their shoulders to personally guarantee the continuation of a strong and healthy society. Within Moroccan legislature a law exists stating that Moroccans can be put in jail for up to a year for having sexual relations outside marriage (Article 490 of the Penal Code). Moroccans strictly follow this law greatly out of fear, for if a woman were to have children out of wedlock, many traditional Moroccans would perceive her to be flaunting her lack of chastity in front of them. In an article I found by Ranya Alaoui, she emphasizes this point that, “Sex out of wedlock is forbidden in Islam, for both boys and girls... A non-virgin girl will always be considered as a slut, if not a whore but if on top of that, she manages to get pregnant, she just bought her ticket to hell. And in Morocco, hell starts before she dies”. As mentioned earlier, to lose your virginity before marriage brings dishonor to the family, and the woman must suffer disownment or a beating. Should a girl become pregnant outside of wedlock, though, immediate disownment would ensue and she would be left with nothing. As a single, unwed mother she would be scorned by all, making the task of finding work, to support not just herself but also a child, impossible (Welchman). In the city of Meknes, not too far from the university I am studying at, the Rita Zniber Foundation takes in children who are abandoned by such mothers, who have no means at providing a safe, healthy and nurturing life for the child. While at the foundation, the children are taken care of either until they are adopted by a Moroccan family, or until they reach the age 24, when they are allowed to leave the orphanage as an independent adult.

The importance that Muslims, especially in Morocco, place on fertility and thus virginity is so heavy that they will go to any length to ensure that they are protected even if it means instilling in the youth the fear of religious, familial, political and social recrimination.

Symbol of Fertility

Welcome to Moroccan love

“You may now kiss the bride” marked the end of the wedding. As the newlyweds turned to walk down the aisle the crowd surged forward to bestow upon them their congratulations and blessings of good fortune. The sun was shining and the fragrant flowers were in bloom. The air was filled with music and joy and the bride and groom were aglow with happiness and love. I can never tire of this scene.

After working for three years at the Harding Allen Estate, a banquet hall that specializes in hosting weddings and receptions, I have seen my fair share of weddings. There have been Jewish weddings in which they break a glass to signify the end of the wedding, Russian weddings in which they are crowned, and even a wedding on Halloween in which the bride and groom sacrificed an animal in a graveyard to bring good fortune to their marriage. What fascinates me the most about weddings is that each one is so different, yet they all manage to so beautifully convey the love present in the bond between husband and wife.

Before coming to Morocco to study, I had never contemplated what a Moroccan wedding would look like. The end of my first week of being in Morocco was upon me, and I was walking down the street when a long line of vehicles passed by honking their horns and flashing their headlights. At first I was startled and just figured that they were a bunch of angry drivers stuck in traffic, but then the Moroccan student I was walking with explained to me that it was actually a wedding procession. Just like that my curiosity flared up and a need to learn about Moroccan weddings was sparked.

Right away as I began my research I realized that Moroccan weddings were quite different from any other wedding culture I had knowledge of.

Moroccan weddings are traditional events which have been, for the most part, preserved throughout the generations. Typically the wedding spans between three and seven days, depending on the region, personal preference, and amount of money the families have to spend. According to Jalila Hajji, in her thesis, “A Moroccan wedding ceremony between tradition and modernity,” there are seven general steps that a Moroccan wedding performs: bath day, receiving of the gifts, henna day, the lmida, clothing changes, exhibition of virginity and l’flour. These steps are spread out over the length of the wedding, although a few ceremonies are performed together within the same day.

Moroccan Hammam

The bath day at the local hammam marks the beginning of the wedding process. On this day the bride and her unmarried female friends and relatives spend the day at the public bath, cleansing their bodies and preparing for the upcoming wedding. Married women are not allowed to attend, for it might bring bad luck. At the bath, the women eat food and drink as the bride undresses and bathes in a soothing atmosphere (Hajji. Pg 49).

On the second day, the groom sends his future wife extravagant gifts to display the strength and wealth of his family. A variety of gifts are sent such as clothing, jewelry and even livestock. Often times the groom will send her a few new outfits or perhaps even a whole new wardrobe and at the end of the day she will perform a sort of fashion show to show her family and the groom’s family all that the groom had sent her. Each time the bride walks into the room the family of the groom chants and cheers, the noise level indicating the acceptance of the bride (Kurr). Depending on how many gifts were sent, this fashion show could last the whole night.

Wedding Henna

The henna day marks the third step of the wedding. The women of the bride’s family and her close female friends come together in the home of the bride and apply henna to their hands and feet. Many traditionalists, like Hazwani Che Din, believe that the floral and geometric designs of the henna are meant to ward off evil spirits, bring good luck and increase fertility. Keeping to tradition, as Jasmine Kurr describes it, milk and sugar are placed in the room to represent fertility and prosperity and candles are lit to symbolize a bright future. The henna process is a long one that can take multiple hours to draw the henna and then for it to dry. Although in some tribes a less intricate henna design is used. For example, the Ait Khabbash Berber tribe, who live in the south eastern region of Morocco, take only fifteen minutes to apply the henna by completely covering the hands and feet with the henna dye, for while they believe the henna is to ward off the devil’s minions, they don’t believe it has to be drawn on in such elaborate designs (Becker.pg 120). They also apply henna to the hands and feet of the young unmarried girls of the family, so that they can join in the fun as well.

the lmida

After after the henna day comes the day of celebration, in which all the family and friends of the happy couple gather together and celebrate the wedding with joyous song, merry dance and delicious food. Upon arrival, the bride is surrounded by men, for no one is to see her until the groom unveils her so that her marriage is not affected by the spirits of others (Che Din). After the unveiling, the men in the groom’s family carry the bride around the room on a lmida, a throne like chair to signify that the bride is a princess on her special day. The men also carry the groom around the room to show that he comes from a strong family (Hajji. pg 53). Within the night of celebration, the bride changes her takchita between four to eight times to show off the wealth of her family (Hajji. pg 54).

That night is the first night of contact and in the morning is the exhibition of virginity. After celebrating for the whole night with friends and family the bride and groom come together in what will be their new home to consummate the marriage. The next morning the marriage sheets are shown to both families and examined for signs of virgin blood. Upon the unveiling of the bloody sheets to the groom’s family, money is given as a sign of joy. If the sheets reveal that the bride was not a virgin, she can be repudiated (Hajji. pgs 55-56).

After the examination of the marital sheets, is the last step of the wedding which is the breakfast, also called L’flour, where the families come together and share the first meal as united families. This breakfast also serves as a furnishing party of the new home(Hajji. pg 58). The completion of the breakfast denotes the completion of the wedding, and the newlyweds can continue on in life in wedded bliss, In Sha’Allah as the Moroccans say; or “God Willing,” as we would say in the West.

While all Moroccan weddings follow this general procedure, each region differs in certain aspects such as clothing and more particular traditions, for weddings are important events that allow each region to express their distinctiveness (Becker. pg 105). For example, in the southern Berber tribes the bride arrives at the wedding venue on the back of a mare led by several women and chanting youth (Aherdan. pg 136). Whereas in some of the more northern regions like in Fes and Meknes the bride arrives via a car procession that is honked at as a tradition of paying respect to the bride (Che Din). No matter where in Morocco, though, the weddings are bound to be elaborate and amazing.

Moroccan weddings are extremely fascinating but I am curious about more than just the physical process of the wedding. Is there an underlying principle holding the steps of the wedding together? Do Moroccan weddings serve a higher purpose than simply bringing one man and one woman together as man and wife? How do modern beliefs and practices coincide with deep seated traditions?